Wednesday, June 26, 2013

how to know when you have achieved true cat lady status

If you've spent more than about 10 seconds following me via social media, then you'll know that I have a cat named Bauer who I love and adore. But what the cute pictures don't tell you is that he's kind of a jerk.

Via. Bauer does this pretty much every night across Andrew's side of the bed.

I have had Bauer five years this fall, and in that time, I have become a cat lady. I know that the typical cat lady stereotype has multiple cats and lives alone, but I am here to tell you that you can be a cat lady or cat man, no matter your marital status or number of cats, simply by arranging your home to fit the whims of your feline friend.

In my house, we can't keep toilet paper on the roll or else Bauer scratches it and ruins it. We keep it in a trendy Jonathan Adler box on the back of the toilet bowl.

Not my house, but same idea. Even though it's Jonathan Adler, it's still not cute. Via.

Our carpet? Well, it doubles as a scratching post. Bauer's real scratching post is right there on the same rug, but he usually isn't in the mood for it, so the carpet is the preferred alternative.

Since Bauer was a kitten, we have disciplined him by spraying him with water from a spray bottle. If I want to lean over and give my husband a goodnight kiss, I have to hope I don't get smacked in the face with the spray bottle. We have to sleep with it between our pillows so if the cat is bad in the middle of the night, we can discipline him with minimal effort.

I've seen this glare from my cat more than once. Via.

Forget about sleeping through the night. At any given time during the night, Bauer wants to snuggle. Does he hop in bed on his own? NO. He scratches at the carpet at the foot of the bed, waits for me to get out of bed, feet on the floor to walk to Andrew's side of the bed, walks across Andrew's feet, and up the center of the bed to snuggle with me. Thanks kitty, you are cute and warm, but did we really need to go through that every.single.night?

And my favorite? Bauer likes to lay under the bed. When he wants attention (usually in the middle of the night), he climbs on his back and mechanic crawls the length of the bed, putting his claws in at every move and waking me up. So now we have under bed bins and pillows shoved under there to give him one less chance to be a huge pain. And you can see them hanging out . Reallll classy. Thanks, cat.

But when I get home every day and he's there to greet me? And he races me to the bedroom so we can have snuggle time? It's all worth it... until he gets tired of snuggle time and decides to bite me. Then he's a jerk again.

I can't resist his little grey face! Pretty sure he could be a kitty model, but I don't want him to go all Hollywood on me.

Have you had to alter your house for a pet? Are you living like a cat lady, too?


  1. When my pitbull was a puppy everything was arranged so he wouldn't bite it, pee on it , or ruin it! Now that he's trained though its not so bad

  2. Love this post! Bauer is so stinkin' cute, I can see that he is totally worth it! I'm a cat lady too... and my husband is a cat man. Haha. We've had to make some alterations to our home too. After watching Cats from Hell we decided to make cat walks in our family room so they can walk around the entire room along the ceiling. We have a scratch post in every room, sometimes more than one... there are cat toys all over the house. And we get 4 am wake up calls (it's the worst on the weekend!) because they're hungry. Oh but I love those cats. :)

  3. My dogs run my house, there is no doubt about it.

    It sounds like Bauer runs yours!

  4. Ha ha, Bauer seems quite the adorable punk! My Bay isn't like that at all, but then again I think she's not feisty like boy cats. She's totally trained, never gets into anything she shouldn't (I've never had her mess with toilet paper before!) and is more of a fraidy cat than anything lol. I only had to discipline her for a bit when she was a kitten but since then it's been smooth sailing these last nearly 9 years we've been together.

    I've been spoiled by her for sure!

  5. you lost me at cat lady.... just not a fan haha

  6. I am a cat lady fo sho! Rowdy is also a cat man! Mr. Bauer sounds like he rules the house!
    Ours are pretty good except they know how to open doors and drawers. They take my hair ties and run around the house like they've got gold!

  7. Bauer is too cute! I am a total cat lady too, but luckily my cat is pretty well behaved and doesn't get into trouble too often. I do, however, have cat toys strewn all over my apartment! You'd think I had a toddler living with me! Haha :)

  8. Ha. This made me laugh because 1) my bff is a cat lady and this all sounds JUST LIKE HER, and 2) I've found myself altering my house multiple ways because of this dog that's only around like 1/4 of the time. It's so crazy how animals affect you!

    (PS your cat is ADORBS. I'd let her be a pain the ass too. How do you say no to that?)

  9. omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my cat totally does that crawl the length of the bed thing. it drives me INSANE.

  10. oh my gosh YES! I'm a cat lady with two and my boy cat does the exact same thing in the middle of the night. He scratches the box spring until it wakes me up, then I have to physically get out of bed and lift him up to be snuggled, even though he's perfectly capable of jumping onto the bed.

  11. cat lady here...with 2 lazy butts who prefer to sleep all day. I'm a heavy sleeper so my cats don't wake me up at night (that is my husband's joy) but in the morning i get up to go to the bathroom and my "oldest" cat is right there with me and opens the door if i don't let him in. my "youngest" cat is skittish and loves my husband more than me hahahah


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