Friday, March 6, 2015

i forgot

People like to say blogging is like riding a bicycle. That it all comes back to you once you get back on and try again.

Well, I didn't learn to ride a bike until I was 12. And I never got that good at it. Last time I tried - about three years ago - I ran into a ten year old trying to share the sidewalk with me.

Basically, that analogy is supposed to tell you that I find both of them kind of difficult. I blogged less and now I'm on the train of not at all. I wondered why I bothered, and then I remembered why I liked it. But as I opened the laptop and stared at the screen, I was repeatedly crippled by one thought:

Who cares?

Who cares where I've been eating or what I've been reading or what I thought of the Parks and Rec finale? Who cares that I just can't get into the This American Life podcast, try as I might, or that Easter candy is my favorite candy season? I mean, I can tell myself that I'm a special snowflake all I want, but I can be as basic bitch as everyone else.

(I mean, seriously. My entire house is Target and I'm not even a little ashamed.)

But I thought back about my high school era blogs and how I loved when my friends posted that they were bored. I got it, because I was bored with nothing better to do than post in my livejournal, too. I liked sharing that feeling with them. And my college self, who loved when my friends posted myspace blogs with over 100 questions. We're both right handed and love pizza and are wearing pajama pants (pre yoga pants, I know. I'm old.). Or now, as an adult - seeing that there are other women making life work in their own way. I like to see how they spent their weekends or the ridiculous fights they had with their husbands or the scary thing they're going through and how they're handling it.

I forgot that I've always been in it for the slice of life.

I've dropped a ton of blogs from my reader. They don't tell me real life anymore - they tell me about perfect, aspirational lives. And that's great, but it isn't me. My house is about as far from a Pinterest project as you can get. In the words of Amy Poehler "Good for her! Not for me." Perfection, or the appearance of it, just aren't what I'm here for. Give me all the takes on real life situations. Or things you can't live without. Or nothing, if you have nothing to say.

So I'm going to try to stop asking myself who cares. I care. I'll care in a few years about where we've been eating lately and how I spent my weekends and what I thought of different books. I'll instagram when I want to and not care that I just posted something similar or think that no one will like it. Some things just need to be captured and filtered, likes be damned.

As far as comments go (and if you care about such things), I've added a disclaimer that I may not respond to them. I like making friends and building a community, but life gets in the way and I don't want to feel guilty. I don't want to sound like an ungrateful jerk; I'm just being realistic with myself.

So am I back in the swing of things? I hope. I've gone to so many restaurants and I need to document them somewhere, whether anyone besides me cares or not.

(And for the record, to answer the above questions: food post to come, book post to come, LOVED the Parks and Rec finale SO SO much, I want to love TAL but it always gets boring in the middle, and Cadbury mini eggs are my favorite, forever and ever).


17 comments:

  1. i'm the same way! i dropped a ton of people from my reader and it's so much better to open up feedly and only see a few blogs, not eleventy billion unread posts.

    with my new smaller blog, it's amazing to get only like, 11 comments. i never respond to any of them unless they ask me a question but i just go visit them instead. i call that blogging smarter :D

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  2. Honestly, you are one of my favorite blogs to read, because you are not "pinterest perfect." You and Andrew seem like the kind of people that D and I would love to hang out with on the weekends. :)

    The Parks and Rec finale was awesome and sad and Idonotwantittobeover!! Cadbury cream eggs are my fav. I stock up on them and usually make them last through the summer.

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  3. I was sitting there going, I care! LOL I just watched the Parks and Rec finale yesterday and cried. One of the best finales ever.

    Cadbury cream eggs for me.

    I've always been in it for the slice of life too. I'm dropping my sponsorship opps after this month, they were giving me agida.

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  4. I'm glad you're back to blogging again and that you're doing it for you! I enjoy reading about your life (even if I only get on Bloglovin' about once a month). It seems like a lot of people are falling out of blogging (Vodka and Soda and Babbling Brookelyn...where did they go?). I see that I'm falling out of the blog world, too, and I'm not sure how I feel about it. Most of the things that have gone on in my life lately I'm not sure I want to share with the world or I'm so busy that I would rather indulge and watch TV on the couch instead of blog.
    Anywho, keep on writing and I'll keep reading. :)

    P.S. Sorry I don't respond back to comments either! The ATX television festival sounds amazing, but with David's new job, I think summer would be too early for him to take a vacation.

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  5. During my break what I missed was the conversation with "friends", I read your post and see what you are up to then you read mine to see what I'm doing. It's like we just had a virtual coffee break, even as I make IRL friends I want to keep my online friends too!

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  6. I think you've got the right idea. Blogging to me has always been a "what I want" kind of thing. When I want it to consume my life, it does. When I can't possibly make time for it, it hangs out in the silence until I'm ready to dive back in. And it's easy to fall into the trap of "who cares," but my theory with that is there is ALWAYS going to be another person who likes the same things you do--and finding those people and connecting with them is my favorite thing. Even if that thing is target and being bored. I'm glad you're back!

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  7. I feel ya! Blogging is such a funny thing. I haven't been blogging or reading blogs much and part of me misses it and another part doesn't. The part that doesn't is mainly because of how much blogging has changed over the years. You worry about blog worthiness and other things that I didn't care about at all when I first started. I'm trying to get into the right head space again for blogging. My head space. Without concern about what everyone else is doing.

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  8. I have similar struggles with blogging - it feels like the less I do it, the less I feel like it, and the more I feel inferior to everyone else's posts who seem waaay better than mine. I forget why I do it at all, and then have a 'who cares?!' moment too. I don't know, maybe it's just us two but I think a lot of people with blogs feel the same at some point or other. And if it helps... I care!

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  9. mmm cadburys... sorry, I believe you said something else, but now I'm distracted by cadburys...
    Welcome back ;)

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  10. I totally care!! I like learning what people's favorite things are and what they like to do. There is always something I can relate to.

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  11. I'm glad you're back. and yay for non branded blogging

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  12. I care! You're one of the few blogs that when I click "read all" I make sure that I've actually read before just marking it as read. Easter candy is totally my favorite because peeps & eggs. And despite the fact that they now have peeps for all seasons I still only eat the Easter ones. Plus, you live in Houston so while I'm still here (or maybe if I stay here) I like seeing places to go to that I've never been to before.

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  13. And weirdly knowing you learned to ride your bike when you were 12 made me feel so good. I learned to ride a bike in the 5th grade which made me feel like the last child on earth to learn to ride. By the way, I was just thinking about you yesterday so was glad to see this post show up in my reader.

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  14. I 100% loved those MySpace quizzes (and the E-mails chains with them before that). Let's do one!!

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  15. I care! I care! I cant wait to see where you were eating and read your book reviews and such. Ummm Cadbury mini eggs are my everything! I haven't purchased a bag yet, can you believe it? I walk by and look at them longingly. I will probably cave next week. Or tonight. Whatever.

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  16. I feel this 100%. I mean that's really all I got, lol.

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  17. Yay, so glad to see you back!!! Of course I'm like a zillion days behind...what's new ;) I care what you ate!! You know I love that and I do it too! Reading this really did make me happy!

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I like comments and read them all but I'm not great about responding to them, so please don't be offended. I would much rather visit your blog instead!